10. 1:1 Dialogues

Während den ersten paar Monaten habe ich einige lustige, aber auch komische und sogar groteske Sachen erlebt. Die besten Dialoge, die sich tatsächlich so zugetragen haben, habe ich unten aufgeführt. Um möglichst nahe am Original zu bleiben sind die Dialoge in Englisch.

During the first few months, I have experinced some funny, but also comical and bizzare things. The best dialogues, which in fact happened, are mentioned below. In order to enjoy the satirical elements in the stories most, I kept them as close as possible to the original, therefore the language is english.


1. Carabao milk

Markus in the Supermarket looking for milk. In the shelf, there is a bottle of carabao milk.
Markus is looking for an employee close by and asking her:
Markus:”Hello can you help me ?”
Employee: “Sure Sir”
Markus with the bottle of carabao milk in his hand: “Can you please tell me what carabao is ?”
Employee: “Carabao Sir”
Markus: “Yes sure but what kind of animal is a carabao?”
Employee: “Carabao Sir”
Markus: “Thank you very helpful”
Employee”Yes Sir”

Remark from the author: Carabao is a water buffalo common to work in the rice fields. The milk tastes fine and fresh, although not my everyday favourite


2. Hot Tea

Markus sitting in a nice restaurant in the Robinson shopping center and ordering food.
Waitress: “What are your drinks Sir ?”
Markus: “Do you have hot tea ?”
Waitress: “No Sir”
Markus: “Do you have other tea ?”
Waitress:”Yes Sir”
Markus: “What kind of tea do you have ?”
Waitress:”We have herbal tea”
Markus: “Oh great is the herbal tea iced or hot ?”
Waitress:”Hot Sir”
Markus: “Ok I will order a hot herbal tea”
Waitress:”One hot herbal tea. Thank you Sir”


3. Soda in can

Markus is studying the menu in a nice garden restaurant in the city of Cagayan de Oro on a hot evening. The waiter is arriving:
Waiter: “What is your order Sir”
Markus: “I take a garden salad and a soda in can”. (Remark from the author: A “garden salad” and a “soda in can” were exactly written that way in the menu).
Waiter: “Ok Sir”. The waiter is writing my order on a piece of paper. The waiter is walking to the counter and discussing with the girl behind the counter. A few minutes later the waiter is coming back.
Waiter: “Sir we don’t have garden salad”
Markus: “Ok. Do you have any other salads which are on the menu ?”
Waiter: “No Sir we don’t have salad”
Markus: “Ok”
The waiter is walking away back to the counter. A few and thirsty minutes later Markus sees the waiter standing at the counter. Markus is standing up and walking to the counter.
Markus: “Do you have my soda in can”
Waiter: “Here Sir”. The waiter is pointing to a can of COKE and a glass with ice already prepared.
Markus: “But this is COKE and not a soda water”. The Waiter is looking at Markus with empty eyes. Markus looks at the girl behind the counter and is walking towards her.
Markus: “Do you have soda in can ?” The girl behind the counter is looking at Markus with empty eyes. Markus takes the menu and pointing to the beverages on the line where “soda in can” is mentioned.
Markus: “Do you have this one ?” and pointing with the finger to “soda in can”
Girl: “No Sir we don’t have”
Markus: “Ah thank you”
Markus is leaving the restaurant looking for another challenging experience.


4. Korean restaurant

Markus is sitting in a nice Korean restaurant. The waitress is taking the order. After the food, she is asking for the drinks.
Waitress: “What are your drinks Sir ?”
Markus: “One hot tea please ?”
Waitress: “Do you want hot or cold tea Sir ?”
Markus: “One hot tea”
Waitress: “Ok Sir”. The waitress is walking to the counter. A few seconds later, another girl is asking me from distance:
Girl: “Do you want hot tea Sir?”
Markus: “Yes please”
A few minutes later, the waitress is arriving with the drink. On her plate, she has a glass of tea with ice cubes in it.
Markus: “Miss this is an iced tea. I ordered a hot tea”
Waitress: “Ah ok Sir”
The waitress is walking back the the counter and finally serves a few minutes later a whole pot with hot tea. Cheers !